Why is Bill Gates factoring into my sex life?

I have the ultimate appreciate of Bill Gates. Completely dominated at Capitalism with Microsoft and has moved on to removing Polio from the World. He has pledged 99% of his wealth to charity. Terrific... A living legend in the every sense of the word, but the SOB is crossing the line now.

For as big of a nerd he is, he is no moron. He knows no guy that wears his own pants does not use condoms. Condoms are so 1998. The only thing guys cover are their smartphone. Well, he gave out a $100,000 prize to scientist at Manchester University that are producing an ultra thin condom. Stop it, Bill. change the world, save every dying children, but please do not remove the small, brief, fleeting sensation I encounter sparingly. Make me incompetent on a Mac, but do not make me incompetent in the bed.